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Thu Sep 22, 2016 7:34 am by Pyriel32


    Joke of the Day

    Share

    Billy_Guile
    Serenity Valley Survivor

    Fleet Rank : Captain
    Security/Marine Rank : FMC Mastor Sergeant Major
    Number of posts : 1227
    Location : Connecticut
    Ship Name : USS Echo Burning
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-87424
    Ship Class : Sovereign
    Fleet Division : Marines/Security

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name:

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Billy_Guile on Mon Aug 31, 2009 9:29 pm

    Whats black, white, and constantly turning?













































    A panda stuck in a revolving door.



    Very Happy thats my favorite.


    __________________________________________________________


    Serenity Station Marine Division(SS1) NCOIC

    Baumer
    Fleet Admiral

    Fleet Rank : Admiral
    Serenity Diplomatic Corps : Senior Ambassador
    Number of posts : 4834
    Ship Name : USS Combination
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-77721
    Ship Class : Prometheus Class
    Fleet Division : Command

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Jeff Baumer

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Baumer on Mon Aug 31, 2009 11:19 pm

    Very Happy


    Funny picture in my head. Love it!

    Lastline
    Commander Air Group

    Fleet Rank : Fleet Admiral
    Serenity Starfighter Corps : FSC Fleet Chief Flight Marshal
    Number of posts : 3316
    Location : The Second Chance
    Ship Name : Sun Burst
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-989543
    Ship Class : Valkyrie
    Fleet Division : Starfighter Corps (The Fireflys)

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Nathan "Lastline" Merano

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Lastline on Wed Sep 02, 2009 10:59 pm

    Nice!


    __________________________________________________________

    Pyriel32
    Director of Intelligence

    Fleet Rank : Fleet Admiral
    Special Operations Rank : SPO Fleet Admiral
    Intel Department Rank : INT Fleet Admiral
    Number of posts : 4645
    Location : Serenity Station
    Ship Name : U.S.S. ACHERON
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-97397-D
    Ship Class : Eclipse Class Intel Cruiser (Special Operations Refit)
    Fleet Division : Intel/Special Ops

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Pyriel Danto

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Pyriel32 on Mon Sep 21, 2009 11:05 pm

    weee haaaaaaaaaaaaa!





    Lastline
    Commander Air Group

    Fleet Rank : Fleet Admiral
    Serenity Starfighter Corps : FSC Fleet Chief Flight Marshal
    Number of posts : 3316
    Location : The Second Chance
    Ship Name : Sun Burst
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-989543
    Ship Class : Valkyrie
    Fleet Division : Starfighter Corps (The Fireflys)

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Nathan "Lastline" Merano

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Lastline on Tue Sep 22, 2009 2:07 am

    Voltaire rocks! I saw him live a couple of years ago. He is very entertaining!


    __________________________________________________________

    Pyriel32
    Director of Intelligence

    Fleet Rank : Fleet Admiral
    Special Operations Rank : SPO Fleet Admiral
    Intel Department Rank : INT Fleet Admiral
    Number of posts : 4645
    Location : Serenity Station
    Ship Name : U.S.S. ACHERON
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-97397-D
    Ship Class : Eclipse Class Intel Cruiser (Special Operations Refit)
    Fleet Division : Intel/Special Ops

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Pyriel Danto

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Pyriel32 on Tue Sep 22, 2009 7:59 am

    he was at dragon con accually he's there every year which is cool.

    Pyriel32
    Director of Intelligence

    Fleet Rank : Fleet Admiral
    Special Operations Rank : SPO Fleet Admiral
    Intel Department Rank : INT Fleet Admiral
    Number of posts : 4645
    Location : Serenity Station
    Ship Name : U.S.S. ACHERON
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-97397-D
    Ship Class : Eclipse Class Intel Cruiser (Special Operations Refit)
    Fleet Division : Intel/Special Ops

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Pyriel Danto

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Pyriel32 on Mon Sep 28, 2009 12:37 pm


    Baumer
    Fleet Admiral

    Fleet Rank : Admiral
    Serenity Diplomatic Corps : Senior Ambassador
    Number of posts : 4834
    Ship Name : USS Combination
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-77721
    Ship Class : Prometheus Class
    Fleet Division : Command

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Jeff Baumer

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Baumer on Mon Sep 28, 2009 12:50 pm

    Lol... it's so true!!!

    Lastline
    Commander Air Group

    Fleet Rank : Fleet Admiral
    Serenity Starfighter Corps : FSC Fleet Chief Flight Marshal
    Number of posts : 3316
    Location : The Second Chance
    Ship Name : Sun Burst
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-989543
    Ship Class : Valkyrie
    Fleet Division : Starfighter Corps (The Fireflys)

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Nathan "Lastline" Merano

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Lastline on Mon Sep 28, 2009 1:09 pm

    Ouch a Thousand year download for every thirty seconds of game time!


    __________________________________________________________

    Garfunkel64
    Firefly

    Fleet Rank : Captain
    Serenity Diplomatic Corps :
    Security/Marine Rank : FMC Major
    Number of posts : 1747
    Location : On the flightline, rep'n jets.
    Ship Name : USS Dark Knight
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-117076
    Ship Class : Sovereign
    Fleet Division : Marines/Security

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Art Garfunkel

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Garfunkel64 on Mon Sep 28, 2009 1:24 pm

    They should put a level in for hackers. Lol


    __________________________________________________________
    Alliance Commander: Seems odd you'd name your ship after a battle you were on the wrong side of.

    Mal: May have been the losing side. Still not convinced it was the wrong one."


    Baumer
    Fleet Admiral

    Fleet Rank : Admiral
    Serenity Diplomatic Corps : Senior Ambassador
    Number of posts : 4834
    Ship Name : USS Combination
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-77721
    Ship Class : Prometheus Class
    Fleet Division : Command

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Jeff Baumer

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Baumer on Mon Sep 28, 2009 1:30 pm

    Haha, yeah very true. Hackers & glitchers: Doomed to an eternity of battles with other players who have been given super-human abilities that you cannot attain. Every time you turn around they are behind you with a one hit kill and a "STFU Noob" comment. Every time you try to hide they can see you through the walls and find you. Every time you try to complain to an admin, three more appear and bum rape you from behind before you get a chance to say anything.

    Lastline
    Commander Air Group

    Fleet Rank : Fleet Admiral
    Serenity Starfighter Corps : FSC Fleet Chief Flight Marshal
    Number of posts : 3316
    Location : The Second Chance
    Ship Name : Sun Burst
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-989543
    Ship Class : Valkyrie
    Fleet Division : Starfighter Corps (The Fireflys)

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Nathan "Lastline" Merano

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Lastline on Tue Sep 29, 2009 4:17 am

    Yes! Ultimate revenge! Also every time they are insulted the best comeback they can come up with will be: Yeah....well....your....not...cool!! So there!


    __________________________________________________________

    Pyriel32
    Director of Intelligence

    Fleet Rank : Fleet Admiral
    Special Operations Rank : SPO Fleet Admiral
    Intel Department Rank : INT Fleet Admiral
    Number of posts : 4645
    Location : Serenity Station
    Ship Name : U.S.S. ACHERON
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-97397-D
    Ship Class : Eclipse Class Intel Cruiser (Special Operations Refit)
    Fleet Division : Intel/Special Ops

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Pyriel Danto

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Pyriel32 on Mon Oct 19, 2009 10:48 am

    Dollars

    THOUGHT FOR THE DAY


    Have you ever wondered if the one dollar bills in your wallet or purse were ever in a stripper's butt crack?


    If not, you're wondering now. Have a nice day...

    Stalazon
    Browncoat

    Fleet Rank : Lieutenant
    Intel Department Rank : INT Lieutenant
    Number of posts : 65
    Location : Klamath Falls, OR
    Ship Name : USS Spector's Shadow.
    Ship Registry Number : NCC 60532
    Ship Class : Akira
    Fleet Division : Intel/Special Ops

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Tae'Vishta

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Stalazon on Mon Oct 19, 2009 12:40 pm

    Pyriel32 wrote:Have you ever wondered if the one dollar bills in your wallet or purse were ever in a stripper's butt crack?

    Hand sanitizer .. and copious amounts of it.

    Garfunkel64
    Firefly

    Fleet Rank : Captain
    Serenity Diplomatic Corps :
    Security/Marine Rank : FMC Major
    Number of posts : 1747
    Location : On the flightline, rep'n jets.
    Ship Name : USS Dark Knight
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-117076
    Ship Class : Sovereign
    Fleet Division : Marines/Security

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Art Garfunkel

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Garfunkel64 on Mon Oct 19, 2009 1:35 pm

    Mmmmmhm. I wonder how the hand sanitizer market is these days? I mean, soooo much germaphopia stuffs.


    __________________________________________________________
    Alliance Commander: Seems odd you'd name your ship after a battle you were on the wrong side of.

    Mal: May have been the losing side. Still not convinced it was the wrong one."


    Lastline
    Commander Air Group

    Fleet Rank : Fleet Admiral
    Serenity Starfighter Corps : FSC Fleet Chief Flight Marshal
    Number of posts : 3316
    Location : The Second Chance
    Ship Name : Sun Burst
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-989543
    Ship Class : Valkyrie
    Fleet Division : Starfighter Corps (The Fireflys)

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Nathan "Lastline" Merano

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Lastline on Mon Oct 19, 2009 1:44 pm

    Garfunkel64 wrote:Mmmmmhm. I wonder how the hand sanitizer market is these days? I mean, soooo much germaphopia stuffs.
    Lets put it this way. If any manufactuer of hand sanitizer is traded on the open market. Buy lots and lots of it.


    __________________________________________________________

    Pyriel32
    Director of Intelligence

    Fleet Rank : Fleet Admiral
    Special Operations Rank : SPO Fleet Admiral
    Intel Department Rank : INT Fleet Admiral
    Number of posts : 4645
    Location : Serenity Station
    Ship Name : U.S.S. ACHERON
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-97397-D
    Ship Class : Eclipse Class Intel Cruiser (Special Operations Refit)
    Fleet Division : Intel/Special Ops

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Pyriel Danto

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Pyriel32 on Mon Oct 19, 2009 3:23 pm

    Yeah where i work it is a staple of life.

    Pyriel32
    Director of Intelligence

    Fleet Rank : Fleet Admiral
    Special Operations Rank : SPO Fleet Admiral
    Intel Department Rank : INT Fleet Admiral
    Number of posts : 4645
    Location : Serenity Station
    Ship Name : U.S.S. ACHERON
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-97397-D
    Ship Class : Eclipse Class Intel Cruiser (Special Operations Refit)
    Fleet Division : Intel/Special Ops

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Pyriel Danto

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Pyriel32 on Wed Nov 18, 2009 9:20 am

    A Prayer for daddy

    "Dear God, this year please send some clothes for all those poor ladies in Daddy's computer,
    Amen."

    Baumer
    Fleet Admiral

    Fleet Rank : Admiral
    Serenity Diplomatic Corps : Senior Ambassador
    Number of posts : 4834
    Ship Name : USS Combination
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-77721
    Ship Class : Prometheus Class
    Fleet Division : Command

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Jeff Baumer

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Baumer on Mon Nov 23, 2009 12:17 am

    A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary.

    Every word out of the bird's' mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to 'clean up' the bird's vocabulary.

    Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even more rude. John, in desperation, threw up his hand, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed.
    Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard
    for over a minute.

    Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and said "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and
    unforgivable behavior."

    John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude.

    As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird spoke-up, very softly, "May I ask what the turkey did?"


    HAPPY THANKSGIVING

    Garfunkel64
    Firefly

    Fleet Rank : Captain
    Serenity Diplomatic Corps :
    Security/Marine Rank : FMC Major
    Number of posts : 1747
    Location : On the flightline, rep'n jets.
    Ship Name : USS Dark Knight
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-117076
    Ship Class : Sovereign
    Fleet Division : Marines/Security

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Art Garfunkel

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Garfunkel64 on Mon Nov 23, 2009 12:41 am

    Lol! Yay thanksgiving!!!


    __________________________________________________________
    Alliance Commander: Seems odd you'd name your ship after a battle you were on the wrong side of.

    Mal: May have been the losing side. Still not convinced it was the wrong one."


    Fr3nchy117
    So very pretty

    Fleet Rank : Lt. Commander
    Engineering Dept. Rank : SED Lt. Commander
    Number of posts : 461
    Location : Lost in my own mind. which is wandering. inside your face.
    Ship Name : USS Albatross
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-83117
    Ship Class : Steamrunner
    Fleet Division : Engineering/Ops

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Fr3nchy117 on Mon Nov 23, 2009 3:35 am

    bwahaha! These are awesome lol.

    So there were these three brothers (we'll call them Scott, Luke, and Chris)

    One they they were discussing what they should get their mother for her birthday; it was her 100th birthday, and while still quite tough, (though her sight had left her, and she was blind) she was getting old. So this was a special birthday.

    "Well," said Scott, "I'm going to buy her that $3,000,000 house with the view of the lake. It'll be a good home for her to have in the last days of her life."

    Then Luke says, "I'm getting her a Ferari (sp?) with her own personal driver so she can get wherever she wants."

    Then Chris sort of smiles, and says "I've been preparing for this for quite some time... I got her a parrot a long time ago, and I've been training it..." And he went on to explain how he was having the parrot memorize the entire bible; the new and old testament. Their mother had very much faith in God, and loved reading, but being blind, couldn't read anymore. So Chris had taken loads of money and several years, had sent this parrot to a monestary to be trained. You could name any book, chapter, and verse from the bible and the parrot would recite it word for word!

    So the three sons arranged to give their mother these gifts. Several days after the birthday, the mother writes each of them a letter.

    To scott, she writes "Dear scott, I appreciate the house, but... well, I'm just too old, the house is too big. I love it, but without anyone else, it just seems empty, and I can't keep it."

    Then to Luke she writes, "Dear Luke. The car is great, but it's just too fast for me. I'm 100 years old. My bones just can't take that sort of thing anymore. I love it, but I'm going to have to graciously say I can't take it."

    Then finally to Chris, she writes, "Chris! You always know exactly what I want! I love you. I just wanted to say.... THANK you, so much for the Turkey. It was DELICIOUS."


    __________________________________________________________

    Fr3nchy117
    So very pretty

    Fleet Rank : Lt. Commander
    Engineering Dept. Rank : SED Lt. Commander
    Number of posts : 461
    Location : Lost in my own mind. which is wandering. inside your face.
    Ship Name : USS Albatross
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-83117
    Ship Class : Steamrunner
    Fleet Division : Engineering/Ops

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Fr3nchy117 on Mon Nov 23, 2009 3:37 am

    Baumer wrote:Haha, yeah very true. Hackers & glitchers: Doomed to an eternity of battles with other players who have been given super-human abilities that you cannot attain. Every time you turn around they are behind you with a one hit kill and a "STFU Noob" comment. Every time you try to hide they can see you through the walls and find you. Every time you try to complain to an admin, three more appear and bum rape you from behind before you get a chance to say anything.

    haha and thus we have one of the reasons I stopped playing EVE after several months


    __________________________________________________________

    Baumer
    Fleet Admiral

    Fleet Rank : Admiral
    Serenity Diplomatic Corps : Senior Ambassador
    Number of posts : 4834
    Ship Name : USS Combination
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-77721
    Ship Class : Prometheus Class
    Fleet Division : Command

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Jeff Baumer

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Baumer on Mon Nov 23, 2009 9:50 am

    Hahaha, doh! mmm turkey Very Happy

    Garfunkel64
    Firefly

    Fleet Rank : Captain
    Serenity Diplomatic Corps :
    Security/Marine Rank : FMC Major
    Number of posts : 1747
    Location : On the flightline, rep'n jets.
    Ship Name : USS Dark Knight
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-117076
    Ship Class : Sovereign
    Fleet Division : Marines/Security

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Art Garfunkel

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Garfunkel64 on Mon Nov 23, 2009 12:31 pm

    Ahhhh EVE.... I play C.A. and it's entire community glitches or hacks, almost makes a bond between cheaters.... sigh....


    __________________________________________________________
    Alliance Commander: Seems odd you'd name your ship after a battle you were on the wrong side of.

    Mal: May have been the losing side. Still not convinced it was the wrong one."


    Pyriel32
    Director of Intelligence

    Fleet Rank : Fleet Admiral
    Special Operations Rank : SPO Fleet Admiral
    Intel Department Rank : INT Fleet Admiral
    Number of posts : 4645
    Location : Serenity Station
    Ship Name : U.S.S. ACHERON
    Ship Registry Number : NCC-97397-D
    Ship Class : Eclipse Class Intel Cruiser (Special Operations Refit)
    Fleet Division : Intel/Special Ops

    Main RP Character Profile
    Name: Pyriel Danto

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Pyriel32 on Mon Nov 23, 2009 3:16 pm

    Why she changed hotels !

    Last week, I checked into the Four Seasons in Palm Beach and was a bit lonely. I thought, "I'll call one of those men you see advertised in phone books for escorts and sensual massages."
    I looked through the phone book, found a full page ad for a guy calling himself Tender Tony -a very handsome man with assorted physical skills flexing in the photo. He had all the right muscles in all the right places, thick wavy hair, long powerful legs, dazzling smile, six pack abs and I felt quite certain I could bounce a quarter off his well oiled butt.... you get the picture. I figured, what the heck, I'll give him a call.
    "Hello, ma'am, how may I help you?" . . . Oh my, he sounded sooo sexy!
    Afraid I would lose my nerve if I hesitated I rushed right in, "Hi, I hear you give a great massage, I'd like you to come to my room and give me one. No, wait, I should be straight with you. I'm in town all alone and what I really want is sex. I want it hard, I want it hot, and I want it now. Bring implements, toys, rubber, leather, whips, everything you've got in your bag of tricks. We'll go hot and heavy all night -tie me up, cover me in chocolate syrup and whipped cream, anything and everything baby. Now
    how does that sound?"

    He says, "Oh my God... that sounds absolutely fantastic, but you need to press 9 for an outside line."

    Sponsored content

    Re: Joke of the Day

    Post by Sponsored content Today at 4:48 pm


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