1. Law of Mechanical Repair- After your hands have become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.
2. Law of Gravity- Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
3. Law of Probability- the probability of being watched is directly proportional the the stupidity of your act.
4. Law of Random Numbers- if you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone will always answer.
5. Law of the Alibi- If you tell the boss you were late for work because of a flat tire, the very next morning you will have one.
6. Variation Law- If you change traffic lanes, the one you were in will always move faster then the one you are in now.
7. Law of the Bath- When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.
8. Law of Close Encounters- The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you dont want to be seen with.
9. Law of the Result- When you try to prove to someone that a machine wont work, it will.
10. Law of Biomechanics- The Severity of the itch is inversly proportional the the reach.
11. Law of the Theatre and Hockey Arena- At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arive last and they are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the preformance or the game is over while those in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and who stay to the bitter end and beyond. The aisle people are very surly folk.
12. The Starbucks Law- As soon as you sit down to enjoy a hot cup of coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
13. Murphy's Law of Lockers- If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
14. Law of Physical Surfaces- The chances of an open jam sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.
15. Law of Logical Argument- Anything is possibleif you dont know what you are talking about.
16. Brown's Law of Physical Appearance- If the clothes fit, they're ugly.
17. Oliver's Law of Public Speaking- A closed mouth gathers no feet.
18. Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy- As soon as you find a product you really like, they will stop making it.
19. Doctor's Law- If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.
2. Law of Gravity- Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
3. Law of Probability- the probability of being watched is directly proportional the the stupidity of your act.
4. Law of Random Numbers- if you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone will always answer.
5. Law of the Alibi- If you tell the boss you were late for work because of a flat tire, the very next morning you will have one.
6. Variation Law- If you change traffic lanes, the one you were in will always move faster then the one you are in now.
7. Law of the Bath- When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.
8. Law of Close Encounters- The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you dont want to be seen with.
9. Law of the Result- When you try to prove to someone that a machine wont work, it will.
10. Law of Biomechanics- The Severity of the itch is inversly proportional the the reach.
11. Law of the Theatre and Hockey Arena- At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arive last and they are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the preformance or the game is over while those in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and who stay to the bitter end and beyond. The aisle people are very surly folk.
12. The Starbucks Law- As soon as you sit down to enjoy a hot cup of coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
13. Murphy's Law of Lockers- If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
14. Law of Physical Surfaces- The chances of an open jam sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.
15. Law of Logical Argument- Anything is possibleif you dont know what you are talking about.
16. Brown's Law of Physical Appearance- If the clothes fit, they're ugly.
17. Oliver's Law of Public Speaking- A closed mouth gathers no feet.
18. Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy- As soon as you find a product you really like, they will stop making it.
19. Doctor's Law- If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.
Fri Feb 23, 2024 12:52 am by sirvanyev
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